Tonight, as I was packing my things up to move, my mind was littered with opposing emotions. This was my first home in Chicago, the first place that felt like home since I moved away from home, a place where I could detach myself from the outside world, my sanctuary. This is the place where I have entertained friends and spent nights cuddled up under a blanket watching TV.
I will never forget all the memories I have made here. I will never forget the pork roast dinner I cooked, the night we painted my blue wall, or “Oh, the Places You’ll Go!” that we read together while holding each other. Nor will I forget the last dinner we shared on that round kitchen table and the not quite satisfying good-bye.
As I leave this place, I am not only saying good-bye to the place that has sheltered me but also to the memories I cherish most. I will still have the memories but just like I am changing dwellings, I too am moving away from these memories. With each day that passes in this new place of mine, I will slowly forget about this place I once lived. The memories too will slowly fade until they are but a dot from the past. This scares me. And even though I am excited to move to this nice new place, it saddens me to leave.
As I lay here for the last time in my cozy bed, in my painted then repainted room, in the place where I could escape from everything, I listen to the one song that always brings me comfort. But with each mountain in spring time, with each walk in the rain, with each storm in the desert, with each sleepy blue ocean, a tear gently rolls from the corner of my eye and trickles down.
…a song that will never be just a song, an apartment that will never be just an apartment, and a friend who will never be just a friend.
And so tomorrow, I leave…
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